Class of 2003
My advice is: you will get through this.
In many ways, eleven years ago seems like forever ago. In other ways, I can’t believe it’s been more than a decade since I graduated high school. During my years in high school in Northern Virginia, and actually as far back as elementary and middle school, I dealt with a fair amount of anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and depression. I was aware of my OCD tendencies and I also knew that I often felt sad or anxious. However, I didn’t feel comfortable talking about it with my parents or teachers. I’m not sure mental health was often, if ever, talked about at school with us.
On top of all the typical academic stress a high-schooler faces, at the end of my freshman year of high school, one of my closest friends died after she was in a serious car accident. During my senior year, I lost another friend due to a car accident. A few years later, my great aunt, with whom I was very close, passed away. On top of the issues I was already dealing with, this was a lot of loss for me to deal with. Although my parents love me and care about me, I wish I had felt that I could go to them and tell them I thought I needed additional support. I think parents sometimes underestimate the impact of loss like this on a teenager. I think sometimes parents are quick to write off feelings of depression in teenagers as typical of the age. At the same time, I also think, sometimes, parents just don’t have the tools to recognize the signs of depression, OCD or anxiety. Which I think is the case with my parents. I also wish people in general talked about things more. In my family, feelings were often kept quiet and not discussed. This is very much a challenge to overcome for a teenager struggling and very much in need of talking with someone, particularly, a trained therapist. But starting with open communication at home can be a great first step. I know it would have been for me.
Looking back, I wish school would have provided more information about mental health and how to get through it. I wish my parents sent me to a therapist, but I knew they were stressed with money and I didn’t want to burden them more and ask them to pay for me to speak to a counselor. It would have been so helpful if the school offered free services to speak with a psychologist or social worker*. As far as I can remember, the school counselors were more available to help us apply to college and ensure we signed up for the right classes to obtain enough credits in high school to graduate. I don’t remember any other available mental health resources or receiving any information as to how to find this type of service.
The truth is, the help I needed and finally got happened after high school. During my freshman year of college my depression became so bad I used the college’s resources and talked to a school psychologist for free. He referred me to a doctor who was able to prescribe me an anti-depressant. Through my years in college and onward, I continued to regularly see a psychologist and doctor to deal with my issues. I really wish I had gotten this assistance in high school. I had to recognize and admit I needed the help myself and then make the effort to get the help. I knew I struggled, but I had to truly know I needed external help and make that effort for myself.
Art always was, and still is, my therapy. I knew throughout high school that I would apply to an art school for college. I spent all of my spare time working on my portfolio and taking additional art classes outside of school. Art was a great outlet for me. During college and grad school, I especially used my art to tell some of my story. Many of pieces and installations were a direct reflection of my inner thoughts, feelings and experiences.
Looking back, eleven years later, I hope that students now have access to free psychologists or counselors they can see through the schools*. Many students are too scared or don’t know how to talk to their parents about their mental health. I think many teenagers also just don’t know that their feelings may not be “normal” and that seeking help might be enormously helpful. Knowing that talking and possibly using medicine can be helpful and that it is also normal and acceptable to ask for that help is also crucial. Having a support system at school providing this key information and access to resources would be a good start for the students.
My advice is: you will get through this. There have been times in my life that I didn’t think I would but talking with a psychologist and doctor is a good start and it certainly helped me. There is no reason to be ashamed if you need an anti-depressant to help you. I am so grateful for these medicines, I can now function the way I wish I could have in high school and earlier in my life.
* The school this student attended, did in fact, have psychologists and counselors available, however, unfortunately, the student was not aware of these resources. Most public schools DO have psychologists and counselors that you can see for FREE. If you do not feel comfortable seeking help at your school, or if you cannot access the resources at your school, please visit our RESOURCES page for further help.
You are not alone. Together we can be resilient. However, this website is not to be used in place of therapy or other forms of help. Non-judgmental help is available 24-7: Call Crisis Link at 1-800-273-TALK(8255). Text with a Crisis Text Line specialist, by texting “TALK” to 741-741. (You can also go to your nearest emergency room or call 911.)
You can also chat online with a specialist at CrisisChat.org (between 2pm and 2am) or ImAlive.org. Many other links to various types of assistance are also available on our RESOURCES page. Help is out there. Reach out, for yourself, or for someone else.
My advice is: you will get through this.
In many ways, eleven years ago seems like forever ago. In other ways, I can’t believe it’s been more than a decade since I graduated high school. During my years in high school in Northern Virginia, and actually as far back as elementary and middle school, I dealt with a fair amount of anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and depression. I was aware of my OCD tendencies and I also knew that I often felt sad or anxious. However, I didn’t feel comfortable talking about it with my parents or teachers. I’m not sure mental health was often, if ever, talked about at school with us.
On top of all the typical academic stress a high-schooler faces, at the end of my freshman year of high school, one of my closest friends died after she was in a serious car accident. During my senior year, I lost another friend due to a car accident. A few years later, my great aunt, with whom I was very close, passed away. On top of the issues I was already dealing with, this was a lot of loss for me to deal with. Although my parents love me and care about me, I wish I had felt that I could go to them and tell them I thought I needed additional support. I think parents sometimes underestimate the impact of loss like this on a teenager. I think sometimes parents are quick to write off feelings of depression in teenagers as typical of the age. At the same time, I also think, sometimes, parents just don’t have the tools to recognize the signs of depression, OCD or anxiety. Which I think is the case with my parents. I also wish people in general talked about things more. In my family, feelings were often kept quiet and not discussed. This is very much a challenge to overcome for a teenager struggling and very much in need of talking with someone, particularly, a trained therapist. But starting with open communication at home can be a great first step. I know it would have been for me.
Looking back, I wish school would have provided more information about mental health and how to get through it. I wish my parents sent me to a therapist, but I knew they were stressed with money and I didn’t want to burden them more and ask them to pay for me to speak to a counselor. It would have been so helpful if the school offered free services to speak with a psychologist or social worker*. As far as I can remember, the school counselors were more available to help us apply to college and ensure we signed up for the right classes to obtain enough credits in high school to graduate. I don’t remember any other available mental health resources or receiving any information as to how to find this type of service.
The truth is, the help I needed and finally got happened after high school. During my freshman year of college my depression became so bad I used the college’s resources and talked to a school psychologist for free. He referred me to a doctor who was able to prescribe me an anti-depressant. Through my years in college and onward, I continued to regularly see a psychologist and doctor to deal with my issues. I really wish I had gotten this assistance in high school. I had to recognize and admit I needed the help myself and then make the effort to get the help. I knew I struggled, but I had to truly know I needed external help and make that effort for myself.
Art always was, and still is, my therapy. I knew throughout high school that I would apply to an art school for college. I spent all of my spare time working on my portfolio and taking additional art classes outside of school. Art was a great outlet for me. During college and grad school, I especially used my art to tell some of my story. Many of pieces and installations were a direct reflection of my inner thoughts, feelings and experiences.
Looking back, eleven years later, I hope that students now have access to free psychologists or counselors they can see through the schools*. Many students are too scared or don’t know how to talk to their parents about their mental health. I think many teenagers also just don’t know that their feelings may not be “normal” and that seeking help might be enormously helpful. Knowing that talking and possibly using medicine can be helpful and that it is also normal and acceptable to ask for that help is also crucial. Having a support system at school providing this key information and access to resources would be a good start for the students.
My advice is: you will get through this. There have been times in my life that I didn’t think I would but talking with a psychologist and doctor is a good start and it certainly helped me. There is no reason to be ashamed if you need an anti-depressant to help you. I am so grateful for these medicines, I can now function the way I wish I could have in high school and earlier in my life.
* The school this student attended, did in fact, have psychologists and counselors available, however, unfortunately, the student was not aware of these resources. Most public schools DO have psychologists and counselors that you can see for FREE. If you do not feel comfortable seeking help at your school, or if you cannot access the resources at your school, please visit our RESOURCES page for further help.
You are not alone. Together we can be resilient. However, this website is not to be used in place of therapy or other forms of help. Non-judgmental help is available 24-7: Call Crisis Link at 1-800-273-TALK(8255). Text with a Crisis Text Line specialist, by texting “TALK” to 741-741. (You can also go to your nearest emergency room or call 911.)
You can also chat online with a specialist at CrisisChat.org (between 2pm and 2am) or ImAlive.org. Many other links to various types of assistance are also available on our RESOURCES page. Help is out there. Reach out, for yourself, or for someone else.
